Every once in a while we do a cleanup...just like our rooms, cabinets etc. Generally the things we don’t need anymore are discarded and the ones we rarely use are kept at the back of the shelves. Similarly even with life... our brain processes memory with the most recalled and used bits to the ones seldom used and catalogs it accordingly. The bits that we should never remember are most often thrown out unconsciously and the ones which should reside inside keep popping in our head every now and then. Feelings most often are kept in such a way that our body recognizes the best and the worst much faster than the ones that don’t have a higher impact. Its probably because the extremes are the ones we use to compare for the newer emotions or data we receive daily. Anything in between is gray matter - mostly difficult to differentiate between. Black and white are the purest colors and so the highest degree of feelings on the positive or negative are the only purest forms of that emotion. Comparison is a very important tool used for almost anything as categorizing is done within the head and outside with or without your control over it. So here coming to the crux of the matter - Every now and then I categorize my life and wardrobes and take full control over the process. I don’t want to forget things and feelings I’d like to keep with me forever just because I’m not in touch with it or do not have more of it in the present but I want it to be there with me. So here I am today Cleaning Up. Its been a while I know but I guess its time now for that dreaded cleanup.
I guess we all like to keep the happy things and discard the unhappy ones but it's time not do that and keep it as reference to what I do not want ever! It's been for real long that I keep telling myself that what one does to me it's not necessary the next will do the same but alas! This is the real world and you shall receive in accordance with what u will or will not allow. You cannot change what someone will say or do but u can change the effect it has on you. So this time don't let things get to you, let the lessons that come stick in your head. One can only control the way they feel and not what someone else dishes out due to bad circumstances. U can control feelings and not circumstances! So well the next time someone says something to you good or bad you will generally feel good or bad just evaluating the weightage of that statement or action but that's not it - if u feel its repetitive its generally coz your rules aren't set in your head and the grey is more than the distinctive black or white. This is generally because u don't have things sorted in your own head and hence you don't have a clear hold on the situation.
Not always can we look at personal matters so objectively and cold heartedly but sometimes this approach helps you to keep your standards and priorities sorted out and helps you from getting too entangled in the general rut of the "Moment".
Most often this is most difficult when we're dealing with someone of high importance - family, close friends, lovers and idols! When one deals with this its difficult to let go of the position/ status you've assigned to this one person who's causing you all this anguish and you're not sure whether your supposed to let go(clean up) or let them continue to bog your mind down with all their comments, actions and inconsistencies or plain shortcomings (putting it on back burner).I've come to believe no matter what u cannot make people see what they have or don't unless they open their eyes. Helping is what u can do and that's it! Undue advantage and taking for granted are the side effects when the one u place high and above steps down and doesn't treat you with the same respect you have given them. In this case most often you're hurt the most and wonder what went wrong. Well "You" went wrong in - placing faith and trust in probably someone without them earning it! Even if done so one should at intervals check if there is a mutual flow of respect and maintain the sanctity of the relationship. If you feel its one way - whichever way it may be then we surely have a problem. Fix it or Let it go!
What happens hereon will be your fault as you knew it was gonna happen sooner or later. So now we are back in that state of utter chaos. Well this time keep your experiences and maintain the bar! This holds true for the good things in life too. You cant get too comfortable with all you receive as sooner or later your not maintaining your end of the bargain. If u gained some ground with whomever including Family you always have to maintain the bar. You cannot get too comfortable just being at the receiving end coz sooner or later the one giving feels cheated and then all you get is either because they cant stop now or because its more to do with empathy of knowing if you lose this you might lose a lot! So even when its good every now and then you have to in some way or the other make the parties involved constantly interested in this. Everything in life though is not looked at with a business mind, if you do so you maintain your good ties for a longer period than when in a state of "Yeah they're always there for me" or "They're taking care of it why bother". You cannot just sit on your arse and expect things to run smoothly coz sooner or later the lubrication is gone and your machine will fall apart!
The Cleaning is required. Rejuvenate everything you have to make it all new and perfectly oiled at every opportunity you have. If you don't oil it then who will? Everyone responds to gestures from the heart - when one puts in some effort and keeps the fire burning then even the other hand raises to shelter it from the wind. If it doesn't then you know for sure that THIS AINT WORKING NO MORE and let it be.
So now I'm off Cleaning - hoping most make the transition to the new phone book :)
